Ho x 3!
With Christmas fast approaching, America’s holiday traditions are in full force: overeating while forgetting that gluttony is a sin, giving gifts you can’t afford to relatives you can’t possibly like and, all the while, feeling like you’ve contributed to the peace on Earth and goodwill toward man because you spent $.99 on a can of cream of mushroom soup and dropped it into the donation bin at work.
And so, I felt that it would be nice to share a little Christmas spirit with my readers (both of you) and all of the Google-bots that truly are the beating heart to my blog’s self-esteem.
Feel free to download these images I do not own and share them with your loved ones. Or just share them with your family.
Christmas For Men
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Bob’s Christmas Story
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Why Bill No Longer Invites Co-workers To His Parties
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Mr. Gundersen’s Thoughtful Gift
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It’s Slinky!
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Santa’s Preferred Brand Of Cheer
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The Well-Intentioned, But Ultimately Misguided, Gift Of The Magi
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So, yeah, there’s a type-o in one of those, but it was too late to edit it, so you’re just going to have to deal with being let down by me this holiday season.
Again!
Yeah, yeah, I know! It’s all my fault that you drink! I don’t measure up, I’m not good enough, I’m not pretty enough! You’re constantly disappointed that I’m not like that Trudy’s son. “Trudy’s son has such a nice blog. It never has any errors on it. He’s very clever, too. Why can’t you be more like him?”
Oh my god, I hate you so much!
Brilliant
Oh my god! These are so freaking hilarious! I love them! Thanks a bunch. I wasn’t disappointed at all. I didn’t even see a typo, so tell Trudy’s son to blow it out his ass.
If Trudy’s son did blow it out his ass, I’m sure I’ll have to listen how that it had been blown out perfectly and “with class” and “oh, such grace with his buttocks muscles” and, Ugh!
Oh my gosh, you make me laugh so much. I talked with Stefan on the phone tonight, looks like I may be hopping on the geek train myself pretty soon,…maybe..
That’s great news, Diva.
Thanks! Should be a lot of fun. I’m excited! I can’t wait to tell Trudy. Her son isn’t nearly as cool as you and I are.
This was great! Where did the graphics come from? I want some….
I got the images from Plan59. There’s a link in that first widget of my blog. They have great stuff.
Wait, wasn’t Trudy’s son the kid who ate paste through the 11th grade?
yeah, no thanks. I’ll stick with you Calahan.
Hey,did you always not have a “like” button? Because Trudy’s son’s blog has a-
nevermind.
It got turned off, for some reason. That reason is Trudy’s stupid son, I’m guessing. He’s not perfect!
I’ll turn it back on.
Thanks, Guapo. That’s one thing I can hold over him, now.
I did notice you forgot the “it” in the picture with Marcia but that’s only because I’m an asshole who should be married to Bill and/or related to the Flendersons. Merry vintage Christmas calahan!
You found the error, Ericka. Good work.
The prize? Disappointment and dwindling respect. I can’t win.
Boooo why can’t i find the “like” button???
It should be back.
Wait a second … where’s the Marmaduke section!?!
My dog ate it.
Pssht. Calahan, don’t let anyone tell you that you are not pretty enough! You are the prettiest man I know. Even prettier than Trudy’s son. In fact, I didn’t see the typo because I was distracted by all your prettyness.
I agree, fully.
Aw, thanks, Four Eyes. That means a lot. It’s nice to feel pretty.
I love you, Cal! A laughter-produced tear tricked down my cheek.
That is one of the best compliments I’ve ever gotten. Thanks!
This post nails the holiday season perfectly! Excellent Mike! Rumor has it that Trudy’s son is an android. Gimme Calahan.
I can’t compete with an android. A tin can from Trudy’s garage, maybe, but an android? I just don’t know…
THAT SECOND ONE! It’s how I feel when I see people walking into a work christmas party.
I thought you worked from home.
I do, but I still have to endure Christmas get togethers. I can’t escape it completely.
Works of art, every one. Regarding the Cadillac-owning 19-year old–well, isn’t that why we sock away money in IRAs and 401Ks?–So that in late middle age we can, however briefly and at no small cost to our personal lives, buy back some of that sex-appeal that we never really had in the first place?
Also, I’ll grant you that it’s a foot-in-mouth situation for Bob, but the Flendersons really do suck.
The worst part is that the Felndersons weren’t even invited. They assumed they were, but they weren’t. On top of that, the gifts they brought were all free samples from Mr. Flenderson’s job at the shoe polish factory.
My boss heard me laughing and had to come look as well, haha. I hope your funny bone never heals!
I’m glad I didn’t get you in trouble for being online at work.
These are great!! I watched an old Christmas movie last night, and instead of cookies and milk, they left Santa a martini glass filled with wine, and a cigar. He lit that baby up and puffed some rings around the tree. It was beautiful.
Seriously? Which movie was that? I need to see it.
The Christmas Visitor!
That is beautiful! I love that even something that innocent devolves into violence in some way. Ha.
Hahahaha. Exactly why I was glued to the television last night. Love it! That Jack in the Box is an evil bastard!
He would be killed even on the Island of Misfit Toys. It would turn into the Lord of the Flies really quick.
HA! He’s more of a Nightmare Before Christmas toy, you know, before Santa was released and saved Christmas.
Good point. He’d fit in better in that world.
I watched this one too. Also pretty awesome, if you can stand the piercing cries of the poor little children.
The fact that all of those orphans look exactly the same makes me think that somewhere is a couple that really needs to learn the concept of contraception. “We don’t know how this keeps happening!”
Exactly why they are now in an orphanage. Terrible! I cried a little when the teddy bear disintegrated.
And really, if you’re going to give gifts to a bunch of kids in a drafty, run-down orphanage, why not some vitamins or the Polio vaccine?
I wasn’t sure WHAT that guy was gonna give them at first. He creeped me out, even after he started making the toys!
I admit, though, that the coffee pot train was pretty awesome.
Hell yes, that was the most clever of them all. I liked the rocking horse with the boot-head too.
It was very progressive of them, the whole upcycling and all.
I agree! Only now what do they cook their meals with? Pretty sure he stole EVERYTHING in the kitchen.
They’re orphans. They live on gruel and hope.
Does this mean you are going to spend the holidays with your uncle?
Ha!
Now that’s my kind of Santa… you know, the one I flirt with for more cancer sticks each year? I also did not know Jeffrey Dahmer got started so young.